Some sporadic journals of my train riding journeys.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

a lesson in progress

i'm sitting here in the hot Nashville night swatting mosquitos in the woods while waiting for my northbound. and it hit me. i don't like riding by myself. i enjoy the commeradery of a road partner. i used to do these trips so that i could learn and practice self-sufficiency. but now that i know how to ride, and know that i can get around the country if i needed to, the actual exercising of hard travelin kinda sucks. a long multi-train route thru hot weather by myself isnt as fun as it used to be. am i getting old?

a part of me wants to smoke a j, find a bar, get really drunk, stay at dave's house tonight, then book a cheap 1 way ticket to denver, where i can pick up the important projects of my life with what vacation time i have left.

another part of me is battling the pride associated with my image. am i just sitting out here to show other people that i can? when i do catch the train, will all the love of the rails come flooding back to me as the wind breaths hot against my face? am i still worried about the consequences if i get caught, and the increasing difficulty to ride hotshots and the death of the 48?

train riding just isnt as cool now that i dont "need" to. its like playing poker with fake money. none of the chances you take are real.

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